I know you all need an explanation for my version of the poem. So please read till end.
I had tried to fuse two different threads and very few understood that. As one of my friends said it is a poem of love and purity. Even though intense feelings are hidden between the lines it requires a pure heart to enjoy & understand the poem. Thanks dear for this good feedback. Rest of them were in a confused state. After reading my poem one of my friends, who is like my elder sister came running towards me with fists closed. Really I wouldn’t have survived that hit.
I will quote one feedback from my friend (she is a poet herself much better than me)”Our protagonist was waiting for her. His dream was a mirage running away. Then one day he saw a beautiful smile. He was swept over by it. Then he realized that the smile has vanished. But his admiration was so pure that he saw divinity in the smile (I have seen the divinity smile). She became an angel for him (They say you are an angel).Rather than crying he thanks Mother Nature for the wonderful creation of hers (Oh mother nature, You have shown me your divine form). His admiration transforms to devotion (a new world, a new transformation). He finds a path to reach God.
You have portrayed the idea of contentment (I am happy, I am content, I am at peace). It was beautifully written with so many ideas woven into it. Overall a great read. I will give 8/10”
Another idea, which didn’t go well with many, is of a child who sees his mother all around and yearns to be with her again.
I have written much serious stuff in my blog, some of them have generated enough debate. But this was the first time my poem was under so much scrutiny. I think I should stop asking feedback at least for the sake of my healthJ.